For the record

In this whole Leno v. Conan bullshit, I'm rooting for Conan. I think he and his staff are a bunch of comic geniuses. I'm not really anti-Leno because I think he's getting screwed in all this too. I guess I'm mostly anti-NBC because they're the ones doing the screwing. It's sad, really.

I read an interview with Conan about 10 years ago. In it, he talked about how he watched the Tonight Show and other shows like it and knew he wanted to be an entertainer. The one thing he noticed about entertainers was that they could all tap dance, so he asked his parents for tap dancing lessons. I wish I could remember where I read that. I love that guy.

For a while I fancied that I would marry Conan on account of a giant crush I had on him. Then he married someone else. I read the news on the Internet and was really quite sad about it. I didn't think I was actually going to marry him or anything, but it was nice to think about sometimes. I didn't cry or anything. In any case, as soon as I read it, my phone rang. It was my mother. She asked me if I was sitting down because she had some bad news for me. Then she said, "Conan got married."

**Updated on Jan. 15, 2010 to add**
We stayed up late last night to watch Leno and Conan. I'm hella tired today, I'll tell you what. But what I saw was Leno acting desperate. His jokes were not funny; they were angry and painful to watch. Conan, on the other hand, was a class act. He addressed the issue, but then said that he was just an entertainer, and while all this bullshit was going on, there were real issues in the world. Then he talked about Haiti and what people could do to help. And then he went on and had a great show. He was totally hilarious.

I can't help thinking of old King Solomon at a time like this. Who does this Tonight Show baby belong to? I can't help thinking it's the mother who does NOT want to cut the baby in half is all I'm saying.

Yes, I have a job

I got a note from a friend who didn't realize I have a job. I announced what happened on Facebook, I think, and didn't update here. Many apologies.

So August I got the can. I was bereft, truly, because I really liked my job and my work people. Shortly, though, I started to think that my job loss was happening for a reason, that there was something better out there for me, and I was hoping that the something better was comedy-related.

I became disabused of the notion, however, in September when I was given my job back. I didn't exactly have a choice in taking it since not taking it would mean that I wouldn't get a severance or be able to collect. I was inconsolably upset about it for a couple reasons, the main one being the disappointment that the "something better" lined up for me was my same old job, which didn't seem "same" or "old" before I got the can, but my perception was changed. I was supposed to be so happy and relieved to get my job back and I wasn't, so I looked like a total fucking asshole at my job. For real. People would come up to me to congratulate me and tell me how happy they were that they got to keep me and I would burst into tears like an ingrate.

Honestly, I was furious for having been dicked around (or at least I felt like I had been; in truth, there were people pulling for me in a big way behind the scenes, which is how I ended up with my job back), disillusioned by the whole process (the internal workings of a giant company are a real sausage situation; the less you know the better) and really, really, really sad that I wasn't moving on to bigger and better things.

Distance and reality glasses allow me to know and appreciate the value of being employed in a down economy. I've been unemployed before and while it was great - splendid, really - at that time I did not have a mortgage or any other real responsibility outside of a very inexpensive rent. I am truly glad and feel blessed that I am not in any fear of losing my house and that I will be able to continue supporting the Count in the lifestyle to which he's grown accustomed (bon-bons and diamonds for everyone!).

I'd be lying, though, if I said that everything is back to normal. It's not. Some of my relationships have changed. I don't trust people the way I want to trust them. I feel alternately bitter and jaded and then lucky and grateful. I'm trying to focus on the lucky and grateful part. It doesn't always work, but I try.

One thing that the whole situation really brought to the forefront for me, though, is how important my radio life is to me. Especially since starting this job, I've thought about giving it up so many times. It brings me so much joy, yes, but it also means I only have one day truly off each week and I can almost never go away for a weekend. A person can understand why I'd consider giving it up. When I got the can though, one of the first things I thought of was, "Thank god I never gave up the radio!"

Another thing is that I really do want to make a go of the comedy. I don't exactly know how, but I'm going to do what I do know how to do and trust that the Universe is lining things up for me just right.

So I have a job. Christmas is saved!

Oh glorious comedy

Last Friday night, I had a show in Lexington, then I went over to the Comedy Studio to hang around my friends and watch the network television debut of our friend and comedy colleague, Joe Wong.

I've been working with Joe for a few years now, doing shows hither and yon. I was so excited to learn that he made it on to Letterman. I was really tired last Friday night, and I knew I had to work early Saturday, but I really felt strongly that I wanted to be with my friends to watch Joe on the TeeVee. Did I ever make the right choice. I wish everyone could have been in the second-floor bar at the Hong Kong to watch it with us.

If you missed it, you can check it on the YouTube (I embedded it, but it fouled up the margins of this page, alas. You'll have to click).

The Hong Kong folks turned down the music and we all gathered around the TeeVees to watch. The love and electricity in the room were palpable forces. Just watch his set. He had to pause for laughter and applause after every joke. I think we were all feeling it like it was us. It was so powerful. I felt so honored to be there and grateful be a part of this magical night and the whole incredible Boston comedy scene.

We're all trying like hell to make it. I was afraid I'd feel a little bit jealous, that we all might. But I totally didn't. For that perfect moment we watched our friend on stage and we were all so proud. When he was done, the men were shouting, the women were crying (or just I was crying) and everyone was hugging. I think it was the most incredible night of comedy I've ever been party to.

Craigslist Killer

I hate that this happens to me, but I am just like everyone else in America and I get fascinated by news stories. I've been drawn in by this Craigslist Killer story for a number of reasons.

One of them is that this guy and his lady have been together for four years and were planning a summer wedding. I can't imagine the horror of discovering the person you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with, who you thought couldn't hurt a fly, was secretly a giant moron at serial killing.

Seriously, this guy thinks he's smart enough to be a doctor/serial killer and he doesn't realize that phone records and IP addresses would lead investigators directly to his sorry ass? He may as well have left directions to his apartment with the victims. Give me a fucking break! This guy is supposed to be the best and the brightest? Bah!

Also, the part where he totally snowed his lady gives me the terrors, particularly the part where she's defending him and saying he couldn't hurt a fly while investigators are pulling his victims' underpants out of their apartment. The least he could do is give her some kind of sign so that she doesn't go on Good Morning America and become the pathetic fiancee of the Craigslist Killer.

Also, there's the part where Scott and I met on Craigslist on that fateful day nearly three years ago. I said to him yesterday, "Listen, brother, if you turn out to be a murderer, can you at least do me the favor of telling me so I don't make a total fucking ass of myself on television defending you."

He said, "Don't worry. I will only kill people that I don't meet on Craigslist."

What a sweet relief.

I think this might make it to the stage this weekend.

Saturday night show (please come!)

I so seldom have a show locally to which I can invite you, but I've got one and it's going to be good.

Saturday night I will be at the Basement in Northampton. The cover is only $5, I think, which is awesome because you'll get 15 or so minutes of me, plus 15 or so minutes of my friend Myq Kaplan. Myq is just about the funniest person and best performer I know from my travels to Boston. He's just plain dynamite. So even if you're tired of my jokes (please be advised that I have lots of new ones mixed in with my old ones), you will not regret taking in this show. I promise you that. It starts at 8 p.m.

In unrelated news, I fucked up my back last night while I was putting on my pajamas. Don't ask me how putting on comfortable clothes could fuck up a back because I have no idea. All I know is that I'm basically decrepit today - like an old lady! I had to miss work and see the chiropractor and do stretches and lie on heating pads and take frequent short walks all day. I'm feeling mostly better this minute, but sitting up is a strain so I must away.

See you Saturday maybe? I'll be fine by then, I bet, so no worries.

Audition in review

Tonight I had an audition for a big comedy festival and now I remember very keenly why I stopped doing these kinds of things a number of years ago.

The person I auditioned for is also a scout for a network late-night television show. There were 14 of us auditioning tonight. Everyone totally rocked. I was so pleased with my performance. I felt strong and really there.

After the show was over, I went to gladhand the man I auditioned for. He told me that he thinks my comedy is too much here (pointing to head) and not enough here (pointing to stomach). Too much poise and not enough gut, he said. I need to bring more of myself to the stage. I'm funny, he said, and he thinks he'll be seeing more of me, just not right now.

I asked him if he had specific advice about what I can do to improve. He said I just have to keep working. And he kept saying that I have to bring more of myself to the stage.

I am open to constructive criticism. I really and truly am. But I wasn't prepared to be told that I wasn't bringing myself to the stage because I feel that I am all I bring to the stage. In fact, I was once challenged by someone to bring less of myself to the stage and to be funny without being personal and I couldn't. I don't know how to do that. Whatever.

So afterwards, everyone went down to the second floor to chat and hang around, but I found I was unable to stay. I tried, but I ended up crying in front of a couple people, which was embarrassing since everyone else seemed like they were totally fine.

I pulled myself together and went to talk to Rick, told him what I had been told, etc., and he said, "I love you. You're great. I believe in you." So I had to cry and rush out. Which was lame, but I really preferred to cry in the relative privacy of my car and not in a bar where there was karaoke and general barroom insanity.

So I did. And then we hit the road.

Of course, now it's a few hours later and I've got a little distance and I know that one guy doesn't get to decide that I don't bring myself to the stage. I think he's full of it. And I have to remember how happy I was with my set after it was over. I realy felt good about it. Also I'm happy I have some shows coming up so that I don't have an opportunity to feel mopey and sad about it. I just have to get back on the horse.

And I also think I have to do more of these types of auditions so that the rejection doesn't feel so personal. I don't know how to make it feel less personal since I lay my personal life right out there on the stage. I guess I'm just going to have to learn.

How you know you're at an open mic where you maybe don't belong (but you actually do!)

I've got a kind of important audition this weekend. I don't want to say much more about it here. In any case, I'm trying to get ready like nobody's business.

I went to an open mic tonight that will remain nameless and location-less so as to protect the identity of the innocent.

It was primarily a music open mic, the kind I swore off years ago. And if I weren't desperate for stage time to prepare for this weekend, please be assured that I wouldn't be there. Nosiree.

The host opened up the show by saying (I hope this doesn't give too much away) that she got tickets to see Dar Williams for Christmas one year from her husband, but then she had her baby the week before the show, and because she couldn't go to a concert with a one-week-old baby, she stayed home. "This is a song about a concert I didn't go to."

Scott and I looked at each other and we knew we were both thinking the same thing. And I said to him, "You should know that I know how much you love me. You show me because you are here with me right now."

I think that's how you know that you're with exactly the right person, the person you were meant to be with. If I believed in predestination (which I kind of do a little bit), I would believe (and I kind of do) that I had lived my entire life up until this point just so I could sit in a coffee shop, pay $3.25 for a small cup of babaganoush and listen to a lady sing a song about a concert she didn't go to - just so I could live in the perfect moment of Scott and me looking into each other's eyes and not having to say a single word before we stifled laughter. This is the stuff of life!

I ended up doing the whole set that I planned for my audition. I came in 30 seconds short of the maximum amount of time I can use in the audition, which is perfect because I felt like I was rushing a little bit. I can relax a little. And people laughed even though it was a music open mic. I'm feeling really good about my set and just excited to be taking this next step with the comedy. I haven't done any kind of audition since 2001, if you want to know the truth. I should have been doing auditions all along, but I haven't been doing them. I'm not sure what's stopped me. Fear, probably. But not any more.

I actually ended up having a great time at the open mic tonight, and I met a lot of nice new people, many of whom I may well see again because - get this! - I think I might go back. I surprised myself by how much fun I had even though so many people totally sucked (and I mean this in the most supportive way possible, because I'm pretty sure I sucked when I first started out too). But I won't make Scott come with me. Unless, of course, he wants to come.

I said to him, when we're old ladies and men, we will look back on this night and laugh. I will be in my rocking chair and I'll say, "Gosh, I would love to listen to a song about a concert someone didn't go to." And then we would laugh.

Scott said, "Okay, but you might have to remind me of this story so that I remember to laugh."

Do I ever love that guy!

I need stage time

I need quality stage time within the next two weeks - or even non-quality stage time. I need as much of it as I can get. Do you know anyplace I could snag seven minutes of stage time? Do you run an open mic - even a crappy one? Ideally, because I have to balance my job and what have you, I would like the stage time to be within and hour-ish of Holyoke, where I live. If you have any ideas, please e-mail me.

Did you know that I love you?

Love,
-Jennifer Myszkowski

Tonight's show

One of the comics I worked with tonight did street jokes for much of his set, which is, like, totally lame in stand-up comedy world. There is no circumstance under which street jokes are an acceptable way to fill your time on stage. It was shocking. This guy was getting paid! Probably more than I was!

The other comic on the show is one of my favorite-favorites, so I had some good laughs. I really love the comedy.

I was on the way home from the show listening to Kimya Dawson's album Hidden Vagenda, which I heartily recommend, when one of the lyrics prompted me to think of another new tagline for the No-legs joke. I'll save it for when you come to a show because it's basically going to make you hate me, but it's dynamite. I called Scott and told him about it, and he laughed until he coughed, which isn't saying much, necessarily, since he's still getting over a terrible sickness*, but it counts.

I had some serious hecklers tonight. I burned one pretty bad early on, which I thought would shut them the fuck up, but it seemed only to fuel their fires. It was tricky, but all I could really do each time is go along with them for a minute and then shut them down. Over and over. It was almost as though they were trying to derail me. I would not be derailed, however. They did cause a few digressions, but no true derailment.

*Our Facebook friends may already know about the terrible sickness and what it rained upon our household. Thank goodness for bleach cleaner. That's all I'll say.

How you know your friends love you

My ladies came out last weekend to Cambridge and we had weekend Lady Dinner at a restaurant in Porter Square. Then everyone came to my comedy show. Isn't that awesome!

My pal Jennifer Adams blogged about it here.

The previous weekend Trevor and Nancy came out to see me. A different day last week, Trevor's son Jason and his lady came out as well.

It feels so nice to be surrounded by the love of my friends during this crazy month.

If you want to come out for a show, please consider ordering your tickets in advance at The Comedy Studio Web site. Shows sell out quickly there. It's a small room, and if you arrive just a minute after the show sells out, you're out of luck - unless you buy in advance! Don't drive all the way to Cambridge to be turned away at the door.

Video from Jan. 10

Jokes about Scott, the economy and Grandpa with the new extra tagline.

Fame and fortune, fame and fortune: they will be ours someday!

Lookee here.

In the print version (available wherever free newspapers are given away in eastern Massachusetts), they turned the photo of my head into a line drawing that makes me look kind of weird. Who cares! It's free publicity.

Sara Faith Alterman is a big fan of comedy. She was the responsible party back when that little clip of me telling jokes was featured in that larger video about the Studio. I was excited to do the interview. I didn't turn out as funny as I would have liked, but I'm just a human.

Incidentally, I think Shigella is only funny to me and other people who grew up in Springfield. Remember when the Shigella outbreak swept through all the schools? Some people nearly died. Not me or anyone I knew, luckily. The funny part about it is that there were signs all over Springfield Central, my alma mater, about proper hand washing procedures.

My favorite was a crappy drawing of a clown with enormous hands and a stupid smile that said, "Wash your hands so you don't get sick!" I'd almost be willing to pay money to lay eyes upon that clown sign again. Almost. I wish I had had the good sense to rip one down as a memento. Who knew I would be nostalgic for it nigh on these years later?

Shigella causes Shigellosis. Back in the day, we used to make jokes about shigellosis all the time - oh, and we would laugh. I guess it's no laughing matter, what with people nearly dying. But it's still funny to me.

Comic-in-Residence: Days one, two and three

Day one, Friday, January 2:
Upon my taking the stage, a lady heckled me with a shouted, "Easthampton!" as I was greeting the audience.

I replied, "Do we know each other?"

She said, "I saw you in Easthampton!"

My material went over great. I got lots of laughs and left feeling basically like a king.

Day two, Saturday, January 3:
This was the day of the funeral and I was feeling pretty glum. I tried my Grandpa No-legs jokes and included that he had just died and that I had given the eulogy for him that morning. I built up the tension so much that the room was totally quiet. When I gave the punchline, the crowd went completely bonkers. Even so, in the middle, I thought I might cry a little bit. It took all my power not to cry. The rest of my set went really well.

After the show, I was surrounded by people who wanted to talk to me. I was surrounded by one group who wanted their photo with me, and I was game. I posed with my posing smile face (you know the one). They went on and on about how great I am and how funny they thought I was, and right in the middle of it, one of the young men took my hand and said, "I'm so sorry about your grandfather." And I nearly lost it.

Another couple wanted to talk to me. They waited for the larger group to be done. When they came up to tell me how funny I am, the man in the couple said, "My father is a comedian and I see a lot of comedians and I don't usually think that women are funny, but I think you're hilarious!" What a weird compliment. I said thank you, of course, but I didn't even know what to make of it.

Even so, I left feeling like HBO should reserve a spot for my special.

Day three, Sunday, January 4:
We took a wrong exit and ended up driving around in circles for more than an hour, so by the time we got to the Studio, I was ready for bed. Scott and I bickered in the car needlessly due to us both being totally frazzled from being lost. We were at one intersection where I said, "Which way am I supposed to turn." He replied, "East. Go east!" But I didn't know where we were and there were no signs indicating direction, so I replied, "I am trying to drive a car!" That might not sound that bad, but if you had been in the car and heard the tension, you might just open the door and roll out into traffic to get away from it.

I tried a bunch of new material and I apparently wasn't doing it with confidence because the audience totally didn't come with me. After, Rick Jenkins told me that I have to fake confidence when I don't have it and I can't rely on such crutches as, "Well, this isn't going over." to make the audience laugh and try to win them back over. And he's right. But I left feeling pretty crappy about everything and ready to fall instantly asleep. Unfortunatly, I can't really fall asleep in cars, so I didn't get to sleep until we were back home.

Here's to this week. When I get my DVD from last week's show, I'll try to post Friday and Saturday's sets for your perusal if I can figure out the YouTube.

A kind of big announcement

I don't know if this is a big deal to regular people, but it's a really big deal to me. Like, huge.

I'm going to be the comic-in-residence at the Comedy Studio in Cambridge for the month of January. What this means is that I will be opening every show for the whole month. It's five shows a week, Wednesday through Sunday.

I'm nervous and really excited and looking forward to making the most of this opportunity.

Come to Girls! Girls! Girls! on Saturday

It's come up so fast I've hardly gotten it together to promote it properly, but Saturday (Nov. 15) is another fun edition of Girls! Girls! Girls!

On the docket for Saturday evening's show are:

Coleen Galvin

Tammy TwoTone

Kathleen Kanz

Boney

and me, your friend Jennifer Myszkowski.

Tickets are $12 ($10 for members). I hope you'll consider coming on down to PACE Theater, 41 Union Street in Easthampton.

If you haven't seen me lately, I have tons of new and hilarious material. I feel pretty sure you'll enjoy the show.

Come if you want to.

OMG - I'm totally famous!

The Boston Phoenix is doing this thing where they take clips from a show at the Comedy Studio and then make a little "Three Minutes at the Studio" movie for people to watch. I was there last Friday and I made the grade. Check me (and the other people on the video) out!

p.s. Yes, they call me Jen and spell my last name wrong, but they will learn in time.

Another edition of everyone's favorite show

Dear everyone:

On Saturday night, we have another edition of everyone's favorite show, Girls! Girls! Girls!, which will feature Chrissy Kelliher, Deb Farrar-Parkman, Maggie MacDonald, Jessie Baade, and me, your friend Jennifer Myszkowski.

The show starts at 8 p.m. at PACE Theater in Easthampton. Come, won't you?

Love,
Jennifer Myszkowski

Afirmación, por favor

The thing about that article I linked to the other day is that I totally can relate to wanting the world to give a shit about me. I want attention and affirmation so badly that I do such things as talk frankly about my own asshole on public stages and with a microphone. It's a sickness.

And it's dangerous. Imagine if I didn't have such quality outlets as comedy and the radio and the careful blogging to get my need for affirmation filled. It scares me to think of what I could be doing instead.

Also, I think I used to feel like if I said something out loud and in public that it couldn't hurt me, that I was invincible to the pain associated with whatever I was saying. This, of course, is bunk.

(Aside: If you work in Corporate America and you want to say something is bullshit, you should say it's bunk instead. That's what I do and it has been working like a charm.)

One thing that scares me is that a young friend of mine needs constant affirmation like I do, but about 6.02 x 10²³ times worse. She doesn't get the attention she needs (no single human has that much time), so she manufactures attention by any means necessary (shouting, crying, acting a fool), which annoys the people around her to no end (young and old alike), which perpetuates the cycle of people not paying enough attention to her.

I admit that I don't pay quite enough attention, mostly due to sheer annoyance. It is so hard to do right by young people, even when you're trying!

It's so hard to be a human.

Over-sharing

Here's an interesting article from the NYTimes Magazine about a lady who over-shared on the Internet. It's fairly long, but worth the read. The end of the story is a little anti-climactic, but I think it only seems that way because the rest of the story is so...oh, I don't know. Something.

I used to do a lot of over-sharing on the Internet. Now I just share, I think. I try to keep what I say to my own business and I try not to include anything that is other people's businesses. Of course, it's hard to tell a compelling story without mentioning other people. But you know.

I did some serious over-sharing on a stage last weekend wherein I discussed my asshole, Scott's asshole and the economy, and, well, it was really quite something. I've got a lot of great new material that I think you're sure to love. That is, if you love my asshole.

Actually, people gasped in horror and stifled laughter, perhaps to avoid looking like they were laughing at my asshole. Of course, from my vantage point on the stage, it just seemed like stunned silence. In fact, if people didn't come up to me later and tell me how much they enjoyed the show and how funny they thought I was, I wouldn't even know.

Of course, I got plenty of out-loud laughter for things that weren't quite so controversial. Like the economy. I have to say, this economy joke, which I will not tell you here, is about the best joke I've written (with Scott's help) in some time. It kills me that I will only be able to use it for a little while.

Oh, the humanity!

Anyway, I'm opening for the Gay Men's Chorus on June 7 at PACE, though I think I'll keep the subject matter a little tamer for that crowd. Also, I'll update my shows list so you can actually come to one, maybe.

It's time for everyone's favorite show!

Girls! Girls! Girls! is Saturday night and you're invited!

You know who else is invited? The ladies who are performing: Ann and me, Andrea Henry, Ellen Moschetto and Maria Ciampa. How about that?

The show is at 8 p.m. at PACE.

If you've seen me perform comedy before, I've got lots of new material, including a bit about my asshole, so maybe it's time to see me again for the first time.

Ellen and Maria are first-time Girls! Girls! Girls! performers. Andrea, who has been featured on actual and factual television, hasn't been on the Girls! Girls! Girls! stage in more than a year.

Fresh, steaming-hot comedy is yours for the taking Saturday night.

Jennifer Myszkowski bombs on Cambridge stage

Because I'm worried that this blog will soon turn into the Jennifer-Myszkowski-is-having-a-nervous-breakdown-about-the-house Blog, let's turn our attention to comedy.

I bombed tonight at the Studio. Everyone did, though in the audience's defense, some of them actually sucked. One fellow actually made some people leave. Scott and I laughed pretty hard when the show was over about how bad it was. I actually thought, "What the hell am I doing here?"

I can bomb at a crap club around here, no problem. I don't need to drive two hours for the pleasure of bombing on a famous stage. I was a little disappointed, I can't lie.

The good news is that I tried some new material about buying a house and it mostly worked for the people who were paying attention. I got a DVD of my set so I will be able to look at it and pick apart what I did wrong and do it better next time.

Having a crappy time at the Studio is such a foreign idea. It took me completely by surprise.

Lend me a hand

I was talking with my comedy pal Dan the Librarian about the Valley of Laughter Comedy Festival. One thing about me that you may not know is that I don't like competitions, so I don't want to be in the festival. We were talking about this, and I asked him if they're doing any showcases that aren't part of the competition that maybe I could horn in on.

Turns out they were thinking of a women's show, blahblahblah, Dan asked me if I was interested in running it, blahblahblah, I put in a call to PACE, but they're booked for the night it needs to be.

So, I'm wondering if you live around here and you know a venue that can fit about 100 people (or more) that has chairs, a little stage and a microphone and is available on Saturday, April 26.

If you know such a place, would you forward me the information about who to call and all that. And if you actually know the person, would you place an introductory call on my behalf so I'm not calling cold?

I would ideally like to make a split-the-door arrangement, so that I can at least give comics who drive in from Boston gas money and stuff. Also, this show would be promoted along with the rest of the festival.

Tell me what you know:
jennifer at jennifer myszkowski dot com

Mark your calendar: Girls! Girls! Girls!

Oh, hello. Nice to see you.

The next Girls! Girls! Girls! is on Feb. 23 at PACE and features Bethany Van Delft, Arielle Goldman, Erin Judge, Kim “Boney” Deshields, and, of course, Ann and me. Show starts at 8 p.m.; tickets are $10 in advance and $12 at the door.

Also, I've already booked another Girls! Girls! Girls! for May 17, which will feature Andrea Henry, Chrissy Kelleher, Maria Ciampa, Ellen Moschetto, and, of course, Ann and me.

I was talking with debl a few months back. She didn't realize that I have lots of shows all over the place because I only ever talk about Girls!³. And it's true, I do talk a lot about Girls!³ around here. What it all comes down to, for those of you who like to be in the know, is that I produce these myself. I alone am responsible for promoting the hell out of them so that people come. Promotion of all the other shows is someone else's responsibility. I let you know about them over on the right-hand side of the page (a change that I made as a direct result of my conversation with debl) and I hope you come to them all, but if you're going to come to any, Girls! Girls! Girls! shows are the ones I hope you pick.

Fantastic. Mark all this down in your book.

New material

Ann and I did sets at the Comedy Studio tonight. I did a bunch of new material that made me laugh so hard on the stage that I actually started crying from laughter.

What's that new material all about?

Thanks for asking. I would tell you, but then you wouldn't be interested in coming to an awesome show at PACE on Friday night, 8 p.m.

Yes, Girls! Girls! Girls! is upon us. It's me, Ann, Deb Farrar-Parkman, Mandy Donovan and Maryellen Rinaldi. Don't you want to come and get the full Girls! Girls! Girls! experience?

Seriously, I pretty much tore up the room tonight, as much as a room can be torn up on a Wednesday night. Whatever. Just come to the show.

Also, Thursday morning, I'll be on WHMP with Bill Dwight talking about this show and Saturday's Hot Chocolate Run from 9:30 to 10 a.m. Listen for hilarity.

Can I just say that I love Bill Dwight? I'm not just saying that because he's having me on his show. I actually love him. So does, like, half of everybody. But still.

Thank you. That is all.